Since
the
President's
back
and
has
things
under
control,
I'm
going
on
vacation.
I
don't
have
a
war
I'm
hiding
from
(though
in
the
Indian
Summer
the
meth
addicts
in
the
neighborhood
are
on
full
tweak
and
getting
the
police
a
little
excited,
so
caps
might
be
flying
in
my
'hood
sometime
soon)
or
a
FEMA
director
to
unconditionally
praise.
I
don't
get
34
days
to
kick
it
down
at
my
ranch,
either.
There
are,
however,
angry
mothers
on
my
street
waving
their
fists
at
me
as
I
drive
by.
But
this
is
a
pretty
red
town
so
it
might
be
because
of
my
"Dear
Lord
Protect
Me
From
Your
Followers"
bumper
sticker,
or
because
I
was
listening
to
NPR.
I
don't
know.
But
I'm
going
out
of
town,
I
know
that.
I
can't
give
DA2K12
the
soul-searching,
deliberation,
and
meticulous
care
that
I
normally
would
when
I'm
fantasizing
over
what
luminary
I
want
to
disappear
in
a
hideous
ball
of
flame
from
the
firmament.
I've
got
to
pack,
confirm
the
flight
and
hotel
reservations,
tell
the
housesitter
what
drawers
and
closets
to
stay
the
hell
out
of,
figure
out
which
boots
are
going
to
go
with
which
domino
and
ball
gag
(evening
wear--we're
going
out
a
few
nights),
and
stop
the
mail
delivery
for
the
whole
week
so
it
doesn't
overflow
with
porn
DVDs
and
my
right-wing
neighbors
figure
out
I'm
a
closeted
pansexual
just
like
them.
Sure,
I
could
probably
pull
an
all-nighter
before
my
flight
but
that's
going
to
mean
that
I'm
asleep
after
the
first
bloody
mary,
and
I
don't
want
to
oversleep
my
stop
and
wake
up
in
American
Samoa.
Plus,
carmically,
I
don't
feel
comfortable
writing
about
an
imaginary
air
disaster
right
before
I
step
on
a
large
airliner.
So,
a
tip
of
my
cap
to
the
eight
of
you
loyal
enough
to
check
in
to
see
who's
going
down
this
week,
and
my
apologies
for
phoning
this
week
in.
So
if
you
haven't
yet,
please
peruse
the
archives
(on
the
navigation
bar
to
your
right),
and,
if
I
don't
die
in
my
own
fiery
ball
of
flame,
or
from
the
cavity
check
before
I
go
into
Disneyland,
DA2K12
shall
return
next
Monday,
September
19.
Thanks
as
always
for
opening
your
hearts
and
hearths
to
DeadAir.
