Red Text = Over fuel tank: Guaranteed to incinerate like sausages forgotten on a grill.
Seats A & D = Window seats: Front-row seat for fiery death.

KEY Click on one of the accompanying icons for more on your favorite Concorde passenger! An enthusiastic, assertive femininity A visually-mesmerizing shot of a Favorite Guest plying their trade! An assured, knows-what-he-wants personality A unique, unconventional disposition and worldview A colorful, unique communicator "Oh stewardess!" Passenger needs attention! Chameleon-like physical versatility What's the latest news on this Concorde guest? Selfless, modest, omnipresent A fount of helpful advice, sincere opinions,and delightful tales Resourceful, always an ear close to the ground DeadAir2012 Friend-Sponsored Concorde Guest! A prolifically- newsmaking Concorde guest Re-evaluated seating assignment

Pilot: O.J. Simpson

Co-pilot: Louis Farrakhan

Appendix 1. Additional Manifest

Overhead bins:

• Linda Evans' Hair 
• Calista Flockhart (in garment bag)
• Gary Coleman
• Hallie Kate Eisenberg (the Pepsi Girl) 
• Master recordings of Britney Spears cover of "I Can't Get No Satisfaction"
• All U.S. patents and licensing for the Boogie Bass, Billy Bass, and Louie the Big-Mouth Bass

Cargo hold:

• The Old Navy/Gap Dancers (wearing Old Navy Cargo Pants)
• Carrie Donovan (the Old Navy Woman)
• Puck
• Hanson, Nelson, Wilson Phillips

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Appendix 2. Ground Casualties

1) American Prosthesis™ AmpuTheater

Kenny G "Oodles Of Noodling" World Tour 2012

• Dead: 1,411
• Wounded by debris: 277
• Burned by fire and superheated hair gel: 977

2) Bi-Bowl Field

Promisekeepers 2012 (Ground Zero)

• Dead: 1,553

Ancillary Casualties:

• 1,553 widows who will turn to prostitution, lesbianism, and/or witchcraft and hanging out at Chippendale shows, drunk on Cosmopolitans
• 3,552 fatherless children who will continue secretly doing drugs, attending Eminem concerts, pipe-bombing telephone booths, and having sex in the backseats of 1995 Honda Civics.

3) Wal-Mart #445066: (Location of death within store in parenthesis)

• Dead:
• 27 (Fishing Accessories)
• 14 (Country-Western CDs)
• 59 (Lawn Accessories)
• 51 (Guns/Ammunition/Religious Statuary)
• 74 (Beanie Babies/Pokemon Figures & Accessories)
• 7 (Louie The Big-Mouth Bass endcap)

4) Ron Popeil Presents American Info-Mirth

• Dead:
• Tony Little
• Anthony Robbins
• Dionne Warwick
• Loretta Swit
• Graham Kerr
• Chuck Norris
• Christie Brinkley
• Suzanne Sommers
• Bernie Kopell
• Allen Rachins
• 59 residents of Hexane Meadows Mobile Estates, North Remora Beach

5) Hot Dog-On-A-Stick

• Wounded: 4 employees (Burns [melted Styrofoam uniforms])